You and me were meant to be, close if not romantically

The lyrics from my new favorite song by the extraordinary Julia Nunes. Check her out here: jaaaaaaa

The song is called Pen to Paper. I've listened to it before but tonight while I was studying for my communications midterm those two lines really hit me. Last year my best friend was a lovely young man named Matthew. Those lyrics are kind of how I see us. I sincerely doubt if the romantic part will ever come into play on account of how a) he's not attracted to me and b) I'm not attracted to him but I know my roommates would love for me to even mention the possibility. I would never rule it out but it's not exactly what I have in mind for our future friendship.

And I've tried hard to prove that I am strong. But you know and I know that I've been wrong

That's another few lines of the song. [While the entire song doesn't apply to me these parts do so bear with me while I analyze my life via music. It feels good] Matt saw me at my best and at my worst. He knows without a shadow of a doubt how strong I try to be. After all, my motto is fake it till you make it. So far it's worked quite well. Hearing this song was a good reminder how I need to do a little more fakin' it this year. I'm not talking about being a fake person, pretending to be someone I'm not. Not at all. I'm talking about putting myself out there when I'd rather put that part of my life on the back burner. I'm talking about showing people who I can be if they strike the right chord in my mind. I'm talking about letting people in, cracking the vessel to let the light out.

As John Green has said: "When did we see each other face-to-face? Not until you saw into my cracks and I saw into yours. Before that, we were just looking at ideas of each other, like looking at your window shade but never seeing inside. But once the vessel cracks, the light can get in. The light can get out." [Check out his super amazing and awesomely fantastic novel Paper Towns. It will change your life in the best way possible]

This post has suddenly taken on lots of different concepts. Hm, well that's how it goes some times.

Oh, and in closing: you may have noticed the title of my blog has changed from "dust off your Converse, it's time to save the Universe" to "thoughts for the painfully indie". Search the new title on Google and you'll be exposed to the musical stylings of the lovely Tom Milsom. I suggest you hit up his song "Indigo" first and foremost.