Wednesday, January 11, 2012

On friends and keeping them

This semester I have committed myself to a large amount of responsibility. I have a very full 15 credit schedule and one class that's basically a part time job for which I don't get paid. Upon my return to Utah, I'd even kind of sworn off irresponsibility, at least on weeknights. I need to and even more so want to do really well this semester.

Monday night I decided would be my last hurrah of irresponsibility. On about 20 minutes notice I went to a movie w/ one of my friends. We'd wanted to see the movie Moneyball for months and it finally arrived at the dollar theatre. The plan had been to see it on Monday but we'd never really nailed things down as to what time and who was going to come; before he texted me around 9:30 I assumed we'd just be doing it another night. It ended up being the two of us, but I loved that. We hadn't seen each other in weeks due to break and the busyness of the first week of school. I'll be honest, the next day I was extremely tired, more than I had ever been the previous semester even though last semester I stayed up at least that late or later most nights. I'll be honest about this too: it was completely worth it.

Maybe seeing a movie with someone isn't the best way to spend time together but it was enough to remind me how necessary irresponsibility can be at times. The night didn't lend itself to much conversation, but what we had was enough, at least under the circumstances. Just being around a good friend, someone I know is interested in my life and what I'm doing, is perfectly wonderful at times. I think one reason I wasn't worried about talking a lot was because I know we'll have plenty of other opportunities to talk in the near future.

Even though my busy semester hasn't been overwhelming yet, I'm glad to have already been reminded of the great opportunities I have to spend time with friends and to act a little less responsible. Friendship is fantastic. And at college, your friends are your family. You have dinner together and talk about life's problems and shoot the breeze and sit around complaining about how much life can suck and you talk about how awesome life is and somehow the topic of romance and dating always comes up no matter and your favorite Friday nights end up being the ones where you're sitting on a couch watching The Office. Those are the times you don't even have to talk. You just sit and watch and enjoy each other's company, as crazy as that sounds. My parents always used to make my brother and I stay at the table even after we were done eating dinner because they "enjoy our company." It was annoying then because usually I wanted to go watch TV or read a book or start my homework. But in college, enjoying one another's company is an art.

One of my fondest memories from last semester includes me, The Office, my red fleece blanket, and a good friend sitting in (mostly) silence. It was a Friday or Saturday night and sort of late but not terribly so. Despite all of the great things I did last semester and even last year, trying Thai food, getting a package from Jordan completely out of the blue, watching Jimmer, and going on some truly awesome dates, watching The Office that night kind of beats out all the rest. It wasn't irresponsible per se but it's the kind of thing I know would be good for me to do again this year because of how incredibly relaxing it was.

The give and take of friendships has always fascinated me because of the different ways in which people maintain these relationships. Sometimes it's completely effortless on both sides, and other times one person has to nudge things along a little more. By far, the friendships I've valued the most are the ones in which things are what I call effortlessly effortful. Basically, you're both putting in plenty of effort and making things work, whether it be initiating times to hang out or being there for each other when life gets hard, but it doesn't feel like you are. Everything just flows. It just feels natural and nice, despite the fact that at times you might be working hard to keep things how you want them.

At this time I must bid you all farewell. I have some reading to get done and writing this blog post is about as irresponsible as I can get tonight. I hope school is going swimmingly for all of you.

Last YouTube video I watched: Hank and Katherine Play Super Mario Bros. Wii #36

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