Four books

(I've been writing this post since the middle of November. Yikes.)

This might be the hardest question of them all. I love books. A lot. I think we'll just switch this to three authors and one genre. That's fair, right?

John Green
I have quoted this man a countless number of times. I can guarantee that each and every one of you reading this either read something I wrote that quotes John or heard me quote him in real life. John's books include Looking for Alaska, An Abundance of Katherines, a short story in Let It Snow, Will Grayson, Will Grayson, Paper Towns and The Fault In Our Stars. Though he seems to deny it every chance he gets, John is possibly the best young adult author out there. And while he writes for "young adults," all of his books are worth reading even if you're a "real" adult. John's eloquence never ceases to amaze me. Also, I met him once. It was great.

Jo Rowling
Harry Potter has affected my life in incredibly profound and often inexplicable ways. The first time I read a Harry Potter book was in 1999. I was 8 years old. I've never looked back since. Harry Potter is kind of a huge deal in my life and to some extent probably always will be. I definitely have some weird, evangelical zeal when it comes to Harry Potter. My Hogwarts house of Gryffindor plays an integral role in explaining parts of my personality. When people ask me to share facts about myself, something Harry Potter related comes to my mind every time.

Anthony Horowitz
When I was in, I believe, 7th grade, I started reading the Alex Rider series. They're about a teenage spy, basically a young James Bond. I've been hooked ever since that time; the final book in the series came out March 2011. Besides Harry Potter, these are the books that have taken up the most time in my life; mostly because I started reading them when I was about 12.

Autobiographies of tennis players
So in 7th grade, I really started to love tennis. It was some time in high school that I started reading autobiographies of tennis players, though. I own the autobiographies of John McEnroe, Arthur Ashe and James Blake and have read each of them multiple times. Tennis players are seriously fascinating people; there's something really different and special about them.

---

As the semester really winds down, I find myself in an interesting position of balancing fun and studying. It's not terribly difficult but does take some talent. I don't ever put off studying to have fun but I sure do try to pack in as much fun stuff as possible before going home for Christmas. You come to miss your college friends so much while you're away so seeing them as often as possible in the week leading up to break is the best kind of challenge. Luckily, Becca, Ryan and myself have decided to have an epic Google Hangout session some time over break. The Internet sure makes life awesome.

Just last night I bought my ticket to see The Hobbit at midnight with a bunch of my lovely friends. Back in October my plan was to fly home in time to see it with Megan and Maddie, but then my friend Amber got engaged and there was no way I'd miss her reception so I'm sticking around until Saturday. Back to the movie, though: I work at 8 am on Friday morning. It's going to be quite the experience, seeing the movie at midnight, getting home probably around 4 and then having to get up for work just a few hours later. And I will not regret a single minute of that time.

Last YouTube video I watched: Imagine Dragons - Radioactive

Oh, and Imagine Dragons is playing in SLC on March 22 and I am so utterly stoked already and it's more than three months away still. It'll have been just over a year since I last saw them. A year is far too long without seeing that wonderful band live.

Nothing to call my own

I just got back from playing tennis. It was fun, but I was having an off day. As much as I wanted to play, and I really did a lot, I didn't ever feel quite there.

All I managed to do well was think. I spent the morning thinking about how I'm not actually good at any single sport. I love sports, both watching and playing them. But I am legitimately not good at any of them. The only reason I keep playing is because it's fun and I like to, which should be enough and almost always is. I've always known this about myself, that I don't have a sport to call my own, but for some reason today it really didn't sit right with me. I think a lot of people are under the impression that because I love sports so much I must be, like, really good at them. Or at least really good at one of them. This is not the case.

You know how everyone has at least one thing they're just really good at? Yeah, I literally do not have one of those things. I'm not even kidding. I just do a lot of stuff in a generally good way, above mediocrity and possibly above average, but I have no one talent. Today I wanted my one thing to be tennis.

I've lived the last four or five years of my life with the secret mantra of "Fake it till you make it." It took all I had today not to curse up a storm. But instead I pretended it was all fun and good and that I was frustrated only because I wasn't playing well. And it's not like you can stop in the middle of a game and say, "Hey friend, I'm just not feeling it today. How about we talk instead?" That's not how these things work.

The worst part about all of this is that I should be enjoying the long weekend. I should be enjoying the fact that I had a great birthday, one so relaxing. Just yesterday I wrote how I was more relaxed than I had been in months. Not even a day later, I'm completely frustrated. Of all the feelings to feel, why did it have to be sadness? 

“Sad is not something I like to be. I’d choose angry or bored or lonely or sick or stabbed-repeatedly-in-the-kneecap-with-toothpicks over Sad. Being sad makes me feel… pathetic? Or needy? Or like I’m a burden to the people I spend enough time around for them to be obligated to care? I know it’s irrational to feel guilty for talking about my human emotions in the place where I… write about my human emotions, but there it is. I’m sad and I regret being sad and whdoihadnfjenbfjwe whatever.” -Hayley G. Hoover

I'm going to get something to eat and listen to The Head And The Heart and hope I somehow find the way to choose happiness today. Because whatever I'm feeling right now? It sucks.

Last YouTube video I watched: Thoughts from Place: Los Angeles after the Earthquake