Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Post of Happy Stuff

Yesterday I found via twitter a girl on campus who is a part of the Potter fandom. What the (f) of (x)?! [See what I did there? /Nerd] I'm kind of overly and incredibly stoked about this. It's probably too ridiculous. She's a few years older but having friends of all ages is kind of my life. I mean, I'm friends w/ one of the young men's youth leaders at church. [He has a wife & three young children, so yeah] This is just one of many reasons why I'm excited to return to Utah. I think it's something like 44 days.

Honestly, Utah itself is not that great. Yes, I think the landscape is lovely, the people are nice, many of my friends live there part of the year, but that last one is really the ONLY reason why I will ever live in Utah. In Utah, not of Utah.

There's a lovely band I've been listening to lately, and actually right now, named He Is We. Check them out at http://heiswe.bandcamp.com. I cannot even begin to explain how much of an impact this band has made on my summer in just a few short days, especially their song "Light A Way".

Some quick lyrics:
The morning’s here, and we’re still caught up in the night.
The sky was clear, and everything felt right.
Our time is short, but I’m sure I’ll see you soon.
We’ll take another walk along the bridge, and underneath the moon.
What a find, If I could I’d hit rewind and replay.
All the moments that I wished, I could’ve called you mine.

That is pretty much the EXACT representation of my last few weeks at school. I've mentioned on here about some of the stuff that went down but I would say it's nearly impossible to explain everything that I felt.

Tonight I had a thought about why this is. I'm an articulate person, both verbally and in written form, though when it comes to this I pretty much cannot explain everything that went on in my head. That time of my life was pretty complicated, more so than anyone would think. There was school ending/exams, a boy, saying good-bye to the boys, and more. It might not seem complicated but I made it that way. Yet I was so incredibly happy. I was stressed at times but in the way that I let that stress go any time I was w/ the boy, or any other friends for that matter. When life is complicated like that, I love it. I suppose you could say I love the uncertainty, at least to a degree. I was so prepared for the unexpected after things began moving forward w/ the boy; that worked out incredibly well so anything else unexpected I welcomed with open arms. My roommates didn't understand why I felt basically no sadness once the boy and I established ourselves as only friends but that was just more of the unexpected nature of it all.

When life is simple, as it is now, I feel lost. Literally all I have right now is work and looking forward to being w/ my university friends once more. It's too simple. The simple things in life I'll always appreciate, but I almost enjoy life more when it gives me the most unexpected of things.

Some more lyrics from the song "Light A Way":

And tonight, I pray.
Light a way, on my love.
Light a way, from above.
Shine it down, lead me home,
Back to him.

Please don't misinterpret this as me having been in love. Far from it. Yes, a boy made me incredibly happy for a few weeks but us being friends made me happier than any relationship at that point could have. Friendship is just perfect for me right now. Marriage is at the bottom of my list of priorities. I'm not going to college to get married. I'm going to college to get a freakin' education. I even have a strict policy against not waiting for a missionary; it's called the "You're waiting for a missionary? What are you thinking?" policy. It's definitely possible to wait but why would you? If things are going to work out, yes, you will have to put effort into staying in touch but the extent of waiting is ridiculous. And yes, I do hope to one day see this boy again but if nothing else were to happen besides us sharing our music collections, talking baseball, and sharing stories of our other friends, I would be ecstatic. I know that for this to happen a great number of things will have to be aligned but sometimes the world surprises you; sometimes things end up exactly as you thought they never would.

And now I end this on account of how I need to go to bed. It's almost 2 AM. I did not think I had been writing for this long a time . . . Yikes. So there you have it: a post about happy stuff. And about a lot of random crap that really is not, you know, flowing. So be it.

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