Girl Time: A Thing I Don't Really Like

I am not very fond of "girls' nights." This is not to say I don't enjoy spending time with my female friends but there's something slightly unnerving about a group of girls getting together with the intent of not seeing or talking to any boys and watching a girly movie and talking about how boys are stupid or how boys are wonderful or how boys are confusing. Each of these acts done separately is usually fine; well, except for watching chick flicks. I have a hard time embracing those in any setting. Just putting all of those things together is just not my cup of tea. This might sound hypocritical because, as a girl, I obviously talk about boys often enough, especially attending BYU. I just don't like doing it with lots of other girls around. I can be excited over a plethora of things but rarely do I flip out over boys. I was never an incredibly excitable person and college has just mellowed me out even more when it comes to spending time with boys so when I get around a big group of girls I just don't cope very well.

I'm not trying ostracize my female friends or anything like that. And I'm not trying to demean what it means to be a woman or anything like that. I just don't like spending time with large groups of girls unless we're, like, watching or playing sports together. Or eating cookies and discussing the merits of different types of cookies as far as dunking them in milk is concerned. Or if we're watching Indiana Jones or Harry Potter or something epic.

Since my later high school years and throughout college, I've found myself counting on boys far more often to be my close friends than girls. There is something to be said for having a boy as your best friend. For one thing, there is no worrying that he will repeat what was said to him. (His roommates don't care what's going on in your love life, or lack thereof.) I find them to also be very straightforward. They don't sugarcoat things; at least, my guy friends don't. If I ask them a question honestly, they answer it honestly. It's a beautiful thing. Obviously some girls can also be straightforward but for the most part they're just trying not to hurt your feelings. And because guys are all about fixing problems and finding solutions, I've found that even when I expect them to just listen, they tell me ways to get through things even if I wasn't looking for actual answers. At times this can be frustrating, because sometimes you just need someone to listen, but my friends usually do it in such a way that I am very grateful for their input, even if I wasn't expecting it. Talking with boys is just so . . . nice.

I think we must also acknowledge the wonderfulness that is a hug from these boy friends. I would venture to say the hugs I received from Matthew top any hugs I've received from a potential/real love interest. Well, I suppose they're better in different ways. I might be a little biased on account of how Matt's been gone for almost two years and he's one of the best friends I've ever had but he did give some dang good hugs. People say a picture is worth a thousand words? That might be true but then a good hug has got to be worth at least that much, if not more.

And to share a quick experience over the wonder of what I like call those "boy_friends." They're more than just normal friends but still things are completely platonic and always will be.

I called my one current boy_friend after the event that hasn't ever been named. He came over at 11:30 at night. He was already technically in bed. He almost ignored my call and went to sleep instead. But he didn't. He came to my apartment and talked with me for almost an hour. He listened. He gave advice  in the wonderful way that only he can. It was one of those nights I won't soon forget. The fact that I have a friend who cares enough to come see me at 11:30 at night, an exam night no less, having to walk through the cold, which is a real issue since he's from California, is just really nice.

So the moral of the story is: your guy friends should be your best friends.

Last YouTube video I watched: Chocolate Brownie Recipe - Sorted

Away from home

Ahhh, Thanksgiving. I most definitely love this holiday. I love pie, I love football, I love being with friends and family, I love sharing things I'm thankful for.

The thing about going to a university more than 1400 miles away from home is that you don't really get the chance to go home for Thanksgiving. So you spend the long weekend with friends at their homes. This year is no different. I'm with my brother, his girlfriend, and a few of their friends at one of their homes in Boise, Idaho. (Yep, I'm back in Boise.) Last year, I was with my brother, his girlfriend, and his best friend in Rexburg, and we had dinner w/ the family of one of my brother's favorite mission companions. The year before, I stayed with the always wonderful Sara Soft Hands and her family.

One of my friends was asking me the other day about spending Thanksgiving with random families that weren't my own. Simply put, he thought it was weird. It's not exactly ideal but it isn't that bad, either. Or maybe I've just gotten used to it. To me, it's just great being in a real house for Thanksgiving. My apartment is pretty nice and it does feel like home, but there's something special about being in an actual house during the holiday season, even if it's not my own. (Maybe it has something to do with the grand televisions families have that students can only dream of affording.)

It's interesting how you create families out of friends at college. To a degree, everyone does it, but it is definitely an art perfected by those of us who do not have family within the state or in any surrounding states. We learn not to care that we can't have Sunday dinner with our real families; we have our own dinners. We experience the joys of packages containing food instead of just stealing it from our parent's cupboards. We know how important it is to find those around us who can become our family. If something big or important happens, whether good or bad, we know we can depend on those friends just as much as we could on our own families.

So to finish off this Thanksgiving post, here's a few things I'm thankful for specific to my collegiate life:

• Wonderful and hilarious roommates. I live with three amazing people who can always brighten my day and my life.
• Great friends from freshman year. Whenever I see people on campus from my first year, I cannot help but smile. So many of us from my group still keep in touch and hang out pretty regularly. They helped shape that year into something incredible and I won't ever forget them.
• Comfortable couches in my apartment.
• Netflix. Thanks to my fantastic friend from home, Megan, I have access to some great TV shows and every now and then a few good flicks. So much entertainment has come from being able to use Netflix.
• Classes that start after 10 am. This semester, the majority of my classes were later than noon. Twice a week I have a religion class at 9, but it's so worth it.
• A beautiful campus full of (generally) kind and courteous people. BYU is a great atmosphere. Even though I don't like Utah too much as a whole, I am quite fond of BYU.
• New friends. The people in my ward this year are incredible. I love being around them and just talking. One new friend in particular is quite lovely.

I hope you all have a great long weekend. Enjoy your pie!

Last YouTube video I watched: Internet Love Story: CTFxC Wedding (I've actually watched this video at least once a day since it was posted.)

Kindness and Caring

Today I experienced one of those little blessings that make life significantly better.

For most of the afternoon I had a pretty bad headache; it started out as a dull throb and eventually turned into me barely staying awake in class. Throughout the day I'd been asking friends if they had any ibuprofen or similar medicine and no one did. I kept thinking that if I just ate something or drank more water I would feel better, and I did for a very short while.

The worst part of the day was when I took a midterm on grammar and style. I wanted to get in and out of the testing center as fast as possible. The test was 65 questions, each question with 2 to 4 options to sort through, and some questions were continuations of others. I was done in 15 minutes. As I walked down the stairs to the scoring screen, I was just happy to be over and done with it. And then I saw my score. I got 100%. I really don't understand how that happened. I feel like I barely read a lot of the questions. But that wasn't even the sweet blessing of the day.

Once I finished the midterm, I went to work with my group for advertising class on the strategy statement for our Converse All-Stars campaign. I felt slightly better, especially after that test, but things slowly went downhill. I couldn't tough it out anymore. After being there for almost an hour, I finally caved and called a friend & asked him to bring me some Tylenol. It's always sort of hard for me to ask for help in a situation like that, especially when "help" means getting a boy to come all the way back up to campus for all of two minutes of interaction before he turns around and goes back. It really is just an inconvenience.

But he came when I asked, inconvenienced or not. And that was wonderful.

It makes me really happy to know that I have friends like him that will do those somewhat inconvenient tasks for me. Friends like that, or even more specifically boys like that, aren't around all that often. It's reassuring, one of those small moments that mean a lot more than would be expected. At the time, it meant pretty much everything because I could finally start feeling better, except I think I ended up feeling better in more than one way.

So thank you again, my friend. You know who you are.

Last YouTube video I watched: In Your Arms