Friends who love

Last semester and already this semester I've had some pretty lovely experiences with friends who just do things for me when I ask them to and even friends who just do things for me because they decide to.

The first Monday back at school was fine until nightfall. I went to bed super early but couldn't fall asleep for a long time. I was just feeling too sick. So as I'm sitting there on my bed, wondering what to do, my dear friend Peter texted me, apologizing for not responding to a message I sent him that afternoon. Before I knew it, I was talking on the phone with him and explaining everything that was wrong. And because he's so wonderful, he decided to go buy me NyQuil. It wasn't particularly late at night, maybe only 10, but for someone who was sick it sure felt like it was super late. After bringing me the medicine he stayed for a little while, just talking with me and making sure I was okay. When he left he said if I wanted he'd come over the next morning to see if I was feeling any better. And that's exactly what he did.

The Saturday after that was just not a very good day. I wasn't really sick anymore but the day was just . . . off. I was sitting on the couch with Stacy moping and feeling so hungry. I hadn't gone grocery shopping yet and any food left over from before the break was gone. Becca came to the rescue that day. She herself needed food and she took it upon herself to buy things we could share and other things just for me, like Curious George fruit snacks and sweet potato fries. (She knows me far too well.)

No story of service would be complete without Jeff, though. The number of times over the past 2 1/2 years he's come through for me in a tight spot? So many. Jeff is my go-to guy in a sticky situation. He does everything he can to talk with me as soon as he can. He comes over whenever I ask him to. He lets me bum around his basement apartment in those rare moments when I get locked out of my apartment. (It just happened last week actually.) Jeff and I don't get to see each other nearly as often as we probably should but we're really good at stepping into each other's lives when we need to.

In general the boys of the Lava Lounge treat all of us pretty well. In recent weeks they've been especially great, though. They help convince me to go on trips to St. George and then make sure it's a fabulous time. They skip parts of church to talk with me in the hallway instead. They leave awesome parties to spend a little time with me and then go back to the parties to get me snacks. And every single thing they do ends with at least one great hug.

Margaret, however, wins the prize for greatest surprise. Just last week she dropped by the desk at work, leaving me a new CD and homemade chocolate chip cookies. That morning she sent me a message asking if I was working that day; I thought nothing of it since Margaret often drops by the desk. I was off doing something else when she actually came by but that almost made it even sweeter. It absolutely made my week.

These little moments of kindness happen all the time when I really think about it. Last week Stacy made banana bread for the apartment. Lorraine made pudding to share and then we watched The Office. Badger invites us all over for dinner a few times a month. I am blessed with an incredible family here at school. So if anyone I've mentioned happens to be reading this post: thank you for everything you do for me. And even if you weren't mentioned specifically: thank you as well.

Last YouTube video I watched: Photoshop Song

From perfect to not to perfect again

I spent all summer longing to return to Utah not for the school or because I missed the mountains or because I was sick of Wisconsin (on the contrary, I will never not love being in Wisconsin), but because the people I've met and continue to meet are all amazing. I made plans, both daydreamed and real. I hoped for the best and practiced a lot of patience.

Then I came back to Utah and things were, quite honestly, perfect. Everything worked out better than I had ever imagined. I was living a dream. For about two weeks my life was golden. I never expected to return and feel as if my life was turning into everything I had ever thought I wanted it to be, but that's what happened.

And then it no longer was.

But here's the thing: it wasn't perfect anymore, but things were still incredibly great; things still are incredibly great. I've already learned a lot, both about myself and about life, in the first two weeks of school, though not much of it actually pertains to school itself. The most important things I've learned and continue to learn?

-It's okay and sometimes completely warranted to be brutally honest with people.

-I'm worth more than the amount of time it takes to write out a text message and anyone who thinks otherwise? Well, they can go ask Trent and Jeff what they think of texting when real talking is what's needed. (Here's a little secret: Trent's not cool with it. At all. And Jeff is just full of disappointment.)

-Sleep is not really all that necessary when you're a single college kid.

Wednesday night I didn't get back to my apartment until after 7. I didn't eat dinner until 9. I didn't go to bed until nearly 1:30 when I should have and could have been asleep by 12:30.

Yesterday I woke up less than an hour before my 9:30 class. I didn't get back to my apartment until after 9. I went to bed earlier than I did on Wednesday but probably not by much.

But I wouldn't trade any of that for anything.

It's all in the spirit of being a single college kid. On Sunday I was talking w/ my friend Cameron about relationships and friends and just being single. He vehemently defended his right to be single, even though he's seriously dating someone. It isn't so much single life he loves but more so the carefree nature of being a college student in general. He's got roommates he loves and doesn't have to "schedule" spending time with them, which is something I cherish as well. I'm not opposed to this single collegiate life by any means, but it was just interesting to hear someone else's perspective on a life that is both similar and terribly different than my own. It just so happened that Wednesday and Thursday turned into the kind of days that epitomize my collegiate life.

On Wednesday I was on campus only until 5 since my evening class got out early; it's supposed to end at 6:30. Walking home I ran into a girl from home who just got back from her mission. Since it's been a year and a half we talked for almost an hour.

Then I booked it over to Mckenna's since she was opening her mission call! She's going to the Czech/Slovak mission. It's going to be quite the adventure. I'm excited to add yet another person to my list of people I've written letters to.

By the time I got home from Mckenna's, I had to finish a couple assignments that took way longer than they should have. And suddenly it was 9 and I had not eaten since 10 in the morning. I made a legitimate stir-fry and hunkered down to finish the rest of my homework before Becca's friend Karina came to spend the night. At that point we went to watch a couple episodes of Doctor Who w/ boys from the ward.

Upon our arrival back at our apartment, Becca, Karina and I ended up talking for a good long while before I decided I needed sleep more than social interaction.

And then suddenly it was already time to get up. Even though I still felt like I could sleep for another hour, I started getting ready for the day. It was a chill day for me clothing-wise. I mean, every day is chill clothing-wise but yesterday especially. The day was full of classes and work. On Thursdays I work till close which is not that bad really but just slightly uneventful once 7 passes.

Becca and I then went on a little night run. The plan was to go just over a mile because Becca doesn't run much (read: ever) so off we went. It was a beautiful night for it. (Only 145 more miles to go!) Eventually Becca got really thirsty and we were super close to Jeff's house so the only solution was to stop. I'll use any excuse to see Jeff and his roommates so I was more than happy. Long story short, we ended up staying for over two hours and hypothetically planned around 3 different food runs that never actually happened.

So what was perfect just a few weeks ago completely transformed into a new kind of perfect. It's funny how life works out like that. I still have lots of plans for this semester, both daydreamed and real once again, but they've shifted a bit. Some are the same. Others are completely different. I'm still hoping for the best and my patience is always being used.

Life isn't everything I thought I wanted it to be. I'm pretty sure it's better.

Last YouTube video I watched: Spaghetti Symphony

Another month of madness done

As yesterday was the NCCA men's basketball championships game, March Madness is officially over. This year was really fun. At first I thought my brackets were going to be terrible but I ended up doing quite well in all of my groups.

For my history class, I ended in 8th place. For the competition done by a local restaurant, I won! This Italian place did a group and I was the winner so I get a free pizza party for me and, like, 10 people. How awesome is that?! And then for the sports desk, I also won. Not a bad year by any means.

Whenever I think of March Madness, I think of my freshman year of college when I completely dominated all the boys I was in a group with. Out of the whole first round, I think I got maybe two games wrong. It was spectacular. They all kind of hated me, or so I was told by a few of them. They literally did not want to see my face in their dorm.

I also think of the last two years and how thanks to my lovely friend Jeff, I've had a place to watch games at all. On any given day of March Madness, I spent around four to six hours in his basement apartment. Sometimes it would be just the two of us; other times his roommates and other friends would be around.

I called my dad right after the tournament started and kind of yelled at him for giving me bad advice on teams, but it turned out in the end. I'll call him tonight to let him know he's taught me well.

Tis kind of a short post today, though I doubt my few readers care much about that. I'm hoping to get a lot of work done tonight on final projects and things of that sort so my last week of classes goes smoothly. I only have two actual exams, and they're on Monday and Tuesday respectively. It should be a lovely exam week.

Last YouTube video I watched: Malachi Our Friend

Girl Time: A Thing I Don't Really Like

I am not very fond of "girls' nights." This is not to say I don't enjoy spending time with my female friends but there's something slightly unnerving about a group of girls getting together with the intent of not seeing or talking to any boys and watching a girly movie and talking about how boys are stupid or how boys are wonderful or how boys are confusing. Each of these acts done separately is usually fine; well, except for watching chick flicks. I have a hard time embracing those in any setting. Just putting all of those things together is just not my cup of tea. This might sound hypocritical because, as a girl, I obviously talk about boys often enough, especially attending BYU. I just don't like doing it with lots of other girls around. I can be excited over a plethora of things but rarely do I flip out over boys. I was never an incredibly excitable person and college has just mellowed me out even more when it comes to spending time with boys so when I get around a big group of girls I just don't cope very well.

I'm not trying ostracize my female friends or anything like that. And I'm not trying to demean what it means to be a woman or anything like that. I just don't like spending time with large groups of girls unless we're, like, watching or playing sports together. Or eating cookies and discussing the merits of different types of cookies as far as dunking them in milk is concerned. Or if we're watching Indiana Jones or Harry Potter or something epic.

Since my later high school years and throughout college, I've found myself counting on boys far more often to be my close friends than girls. There is something to be said for having a boy as your best friend. For one thing, there is no worrying that he will repeat what was said to him. (His roommates don't care what's going on in your love life, or lack thereof.) I find them to also be very straightforward. They don't sugarcoat things; at least, my guy friends don't. If I ask them a question honestly, they answer it honestly. It's a beautiful thing. Obviously some girls can also be straightforward but for the most part they're just trying not to hurt your feelings. And because guys are all about fixing problems and finding solutions, I've found that even when I expect them to just listen, they tell me ways to get through things even if I wasn't looking for actual answers. At times this can be frustrating, because sometimes you just need someone to listen, but my friends usually do it in such a way that I am very grateful for their input, even if I wasn't expecting it. Talking with boys is just so . . . nice.

I think we must also acknowledge the wonderfulness that is a hug from these boy friends. I would venture to say the hugs I received from Matthew top any hugs I've received from a potential/real love interest. Well, I suppose they're better in different ways. I might be a little biased on account of how Matt's been gone for almost two years and he's one of the best friends I've ever had but he did give some dang good hugs. People say a picture is worth a thousand words? That might be true but then a good hug has got to be worth at least that much, if not more.

And to share a quick experience over the wonder of what I like call those "boy_friends." They're more than just normal friends but still things are completely platonic and always will be.

I called my one current boy_friend after the event that hasn't ever been named. He came over at 11:30 at night. He was already technically in bed. He almost ignored my call and went to sleep instead. But he didn't. He came to my apartment and talked with me for almost an hour. He listened. He gave advice  in the wonderful way that only he can. It was one of those nights I won't soon forget. The fact that I have a friend who cares enough to come see me at 11:30 at night, an exam night no less, having to walk through the cold, which is a real issue since he's from California, is just really nice.

So the moral of the story is: your guy friends should be your best friends.

Last YouTube video I watched: Chocolate Brownie Recipe - Sorted

The open mouthed smile

Tonight I was looking through photos from my birthday earlier this year. You know, the one where I threw a freaking cake on the ground and then my friends and I all ate it. I came across this photo.

The lovely young fellow goes by the name of Jeff and he's one of the only friends I truly made sophomore year of college but that's a story for another day. Jeff really has nothing to do with this story either; he just also happens to be in the picture.

The point of this story is my smile. In all honesty, I didn't know I would be in this picture. I was just looking at my friend taking a picture of Jeff holding up a beautiful frosting flower. That makes it all the better. How often are real smiles ever captured on camera? We all know it's not that often. It's one of the reasons why I try to take lots of candid pictures.

I don't mean to get even more self-centered and narcissistic with this post, which isn't that much of a leap since this is a blog about my life, but looking at this picture again made me realize that was the night I found out I could pull off an open mouthed smile. My upper and lower teeth are not touching. And it works.

This leads me to believe that my true smile is not a teeth clenched together dealio like people seem to do so often. A great number of people can pull if off as well. Not everyone can pull off the open mouthed smile, though; I've seen my fair share of not so great pictures as evidence.

Reading back what I've just written makes me feel kind of weird. It was just one of those things I kind of noticed and wanted to point out to everyone else; when I look at this picture it's like you can feel how happy I was. That's not something you see with random pictures. Sure, engagement photos and wedding photos you get that, but not in photos you were unaware were being taken.

I should probably just go to sleep . . . But another thing I love about this picture is that Jeff and I are kind of matching. It was completely unplanned, I assure you, but we totally are.