Lately life has been all over the board. I miss my best friend like no other. I'm sure you're confused as to what I mean by best friend. Here's the deal w/ my best friends: I have my home best friend [Kate] I have my school best friend [Matt] and then there is Marcas who I cannot even explain. In this case, I mostly am referring to Matthew, though I definitely miss Kate. I dare not get started on Marcas. Every day is hard without Matt around. From November when we went on our "pity date" as I like to call it up until the day or so before he left, we probably talked almost every day. We missed very few days; I made sure of it. It's weird to think that he's been gone over 5 months now. It's just hard without him.
School is school, which means it's stressful. I'm not even homesick; I don't care that I'm not going home for Thanksgiving. I just don't want to be doing school stuff. It's difficult to remember that last year at this time I probably was only beginning my friendship with Matt, so at this time I was still struggling with the stress. Now I can barely remember a time before him. I should probably stop caring so much about what I don't have now that he's gone but here's a little news flash: IT IS NOT EASY. I'm making my way through classes, doing pretty well, but it was just easier when you can text/call/run over to see someone who will just make you not care. I want to not care right now. I need someone to make me not care.
That's kind of the goal for this year: find my fake Matt replacement. If only it were that easy, because a) he really is irreplaceable and b) I think I forgot how to make guy friends. If anyone can tell me how to make guy friends, do share. I need a refresher course. How did I ever do it before?
And now I must be off to bed for I do like to be relatively awake before I run 2+ miles with my super incredible running roommate. Lorraine is a beast. Boys should date her.
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