Meh

Today was not wonderful, nor was it terrible. It kind of just was, if that makes sense.

This morning I had orientation for my new job. It's going to be an interesting and busy semester, that's for sure, but I'm excited nonetheless.

The most exciting part of the day, by far, was checking the mail. I got two packages. One was from Amazon, a book for a class. The other was my ShayCarl Volcom tee. I found a way to get it 50% off so I really could not resist. They also stuffed two stickers in the envelope so now my laptop case has some new decoration; I couldn't be more pleased.

Well, I'm going to read The Fault In Our Stars now. I need some John Green in my life today, I can just tell it's one of those days. I'm feeling weird about life and decisions today, so I figure reading will help me put things in a different perspective and give me a way to think about what's been going on.

Last YouTube video I watched: Song For The Painfully Indie

Edit: I've decided for the rest of the afternoon I'm ditching my phone. So if you're in dire need of conversing w/ me, the best way to do so would probably be e-mail.

I ran 1.8 miles today

And now I'm eating pomegranate greek yogurt. (When you're describing this type of yogurt are you supposed to capitalize it to be Greek? I have no idea.)

Buying Greek yogurt has become a small pleasure of mine. For a 6 oz. container it's around $1.25 but I can no longer help myself. It's terribly delicious, especially the pineapple one. It usually doesn't last more than a day or two in the refrigerator before I insist on eating it, which makes the rest of the week before I go shopping really depressing.

Back to my running now: It felt, well, awesome. I didn't necessarily enjoy it, but I liked it. I think I'm getting to the point of enjoyment. Maybe. I used to always listen to music when I ran; I have a bunch of running/action playlists on my iPod. Lately I've taken to listening to podcasts, specifically WTKGTS. I literally laughed out loud a few times, even though I'd already listened to the particular episode at least twice before. Shay and Colette always make me laugh.

The reasons I went running are as follows:

1. I needed to. I haven't played racquetball in a week or so now and I haven't done much other legitimate exercise either. Walking all around campus can sometimes be exercise enough. 
2. I had not gone running in . . . a while. I don't know exactly how long it has been but it's been long enough to justify going again.
3. The weather was perfect. It's just warm enough out that you feel like you're working out but you don't get overheated or too cold.
4. I didn't have much else to do. Tomorrow is the last official day of classes and I literally have all night to do everything else I need to do, which is not much. I'm going to start studying for an exam the moment I finish this post.
5. I needed to in another sense. Go read this post and that'll kind of explain why. Listening to the podcasts allows me to shut my brain off like I do when playing other sports and I needed to replace some of the hurt or emotion or whatever with the pain of running. It worked. (And don't worry, the emotions I talked about then are different from the emotions now. I'm over that whole situation from December.) 

So there you have it. If the weather is nice, go out and enjoy it. If it's not, still get out of your apartment and do something fun, especially before you get bogged down with end the of the semester school work. You won't regret it.

Last YouTube video I watched: Make It Count

Birthdays (and other things)

Yesterday was the birthday of one of my best friends. He turned 21. He's also halfway across the world in the United Kingdom, so that's neat. He's been there for over a year and a half now.

I wrote the above paragraph earlier today. I can't remember why exactly I felt the need to tell the world, the tiny, tiny world of my blog, that one of my boys had his birthday. It felt important at the time . . .

Nothing of great importance has occurred lately, though. Today it was 65 F so that was fantastic. Because of that I've worn shorts the past few days, which is also fantastic. Series 6 of Doctor Who is now on Netflix which has given me something lovely to watch that I haven't seen in a while. Becca and I also got Panda Express for dinner tonight; I even have some left over for my breakfast. Over this last weekend I got some quality hugs as well. Some of my friends give dang good hugs. It's been a while since I had a truly satisfactory hug and I only realized that when my friend Phil hugged me, like, at least three times over the past two days. (You know a hug is good when you immediately think, "More hug, please" when you stop hugging.)

So while things of "importance" haven't happened, some pretty nice things have, I suppose. I've needed these little reminders of good life. Another thing that helped was talking to my journalism friend Taylor. She's a year younger than me but we've gotten into the program at the same time. Today we talked about the whole "sophomore slump" thing. She's kind of in it now and I was kind of in it last year. Expressing how far I've come and all the changes I've experienced in the last year or so was much needed. I've come a long way. Junior year has been quite lovely and I don't think I would change a single thing about it.

I realize I can tie in the whole "best friend birthday" thing. He's one of the reasons last year was bearable and this year is going to be even more fantastic. His letters kept me going through tough stuff. I've learned things about him and he's learned things about me through our letters that we probably never would have known otherwise. Letters are nice that way. (When's the last time you received a handwritten note? Or better yet, when's the last time you wrote one?)

In other big news, today is ShayCarl's birthday! If you don't know who he is, make sure to check out the Shaytards right quick. He's the guy who made it possible for me to write the post on happiness being a choice.

To leave you with some ShayCarl wisdom now: The secrets to life are hidden behind the word cliche.

Last YouTube video I watched: Hank is an Adorable, Drunk Princess

Feelings

Yesterday was weird. This whole week has been, really. And it's all because of those blasted feelings and emotions. Why do they suck so much? (Obviously I'm kidding. Sort of.)

I usually don't have a very hard time discerning my own feelings, so when complicated situations come up and suddenly in one day everything I thought is not what it was, I get a little frustrated. (For as well as I can discern my own feelings, I do not, however, always do a very good job of sharing them.) Of course, it wouldn't be life without change, but that doesn't make it any less difficult. I consider myself a pretty positive person and I've gone through times of sadness, times which have made me all the more certain that faking being happy is a lot better than being straight up sad. Because I've done the "sad thing" before, I'm now quite reluctant to act sad about things I should be upset over. There's a lot to be said for experiencing sadness and disappointment, especially when it's warranted. So how do you balance that? How do you balance the importance that is being happy with the importance of acknowledging that it's okay to be sad?

Caring, feeling, and connecting: all of these things just get in the way of life, yet they make up so much of life at the same time. People feel this desire to connect, on any number of levels and for any number of reasons, but it is when these connections are broken that we are most unhappy.

I guess we just have to take comfort in the fact that everything passes, everything ends. Just as the good times end, so do the bad. And then we can go off once again to make some more connections, to share more of our feelings, to care even more.

Last YouTube video I watched: Put the important things first and the rest will fit

A little something to watch

Just go watch this stuff: SHAYTARDS

Watching Shay and his family will make all of your wildest dreams come true. And if not that, you won't stop smiling. That I can guarantee.

Isn't YouTube grand? I love it. Hopefully it can keep its community vibe alive. Shay, though easily a big time YouTuber, sure doesn't act like one. He's a down to earth guy who is just doing something he loves: filming videos and spending time with his family. Good on him.

I'm going to watch more 30 Rock now. Summer is a tough life . . .

P.S. I sent my first package ever today. It was to the boy in Scotland. It contains delicious Reese's Pieces, all the best pictures that chronicle sophomore year, and a sweet letter. I'm so excited for him to get it. I feel like it's been forever since I wrote back to him.